for all we can save circlesFacilitation tips & guidelines
For deeper reading on group facilitation, check out adrienne maree brown’s book Holding Change: The Way of Emergent Strategy Facilitation and Mediation.
Circles are all about connecting with others through generous, inclusive, and open dialogue. That depends on creating a safe “container” in which people feel comfortable expressing themselves authentically — including their lived experiences, ideas, anxieties, hopes, frustrations, etc. — and have a shared sense of acceptance and trust. The group agreements outlined in session 1 are a critical tool for creating and sustaining a strong container, able to hold people’s multiple truths and foster a community of support.
Whether a Circle leader facilitates all 10 sessions, facilitation rotates among participants within the Circle, or something in between, the following facilitation tips and guidelines can help create a welcoming shared space and nourishing experience. Above all, use your intuition to take the path that feels most life-giving for everyone in your Circle.
→ Model friendly and relaxed behavior.
Greet and talk to participants as they arrive. If you aren’t already well acquainted with the people in your Circle, try to find out a little about them.
→ Be an active listener.
The Circle belongs to everyone there. Demonstrate appreciation and understanding for what is being said, and others are likely to do the same.
→ Allow for pauses and silences.
People need time to think and reflect. Attentive silence can help participants organize their thoughts and build up the courage to dig a bit deeper.
→ Use disagreements productively.
While it may seem uncomfortable, exploring areas of disagreement can yield rich discussion and even breakthroughs. Focus on the values at the heart of the disagreement and encourage participants to say what they really think and feel. Taking the time to “rumble” productively will help the conversation flow freely moving forward.
→ Draw out quiet members of the group.
Be careful to not put anyone on the spot, but watch for subtle opportunities to bring people into the discussion naturally. Use eye contact and body language to allow space for quiet members to speak up during a pause, without calling on any specific individual. If a section of the group appears to be quiet, ask for a comment from the section, rather than from an individual. Ask “let’s hear from some of you that haven’t spoken yet.”
→ Invite feedback.
Within the Circles facilitation materials, there are a few places where we suggest returning to the group agreements to see how things are going and whether anything needs to shift. Ask what’s working well with facilitation and if there’s anything that could change to better serve the group.
“There must be those among whom we can sit down and weep, and still be counted as warriors.”
Adrienne RichWhat to do if…
The group goes quiet?
Courageous listening draws people out.
First, pay respectful attention to the content and feelings expressed in each participant’s sharings. Then, if the group goes quiet, you’ll have ideas for asking open-ended questions that allow participants to elaborate on their thoughts or experiences. You can encourage participants to dig a bit deeper by asking follow up questions such as:
“Can you say more about that?”
“What do you mean by…?”
As the conversation begins to pick up pace, repeating back to the speaker what you have heard in your own words (paraphrasing) can help reflect their thoughts and feelings in a way that will help them feel heard and understood. This positive reinforcement will encourage participants to stay engaged.
The discussion is being dominated?
Gentle reassurance maintains engagement. Gentle guidance maintains balance.
If some voices are louder than others, first remind the group of the “equitable dialogue” agreement — that everyone will have a chance to speak and respond. This can serve as a nudge to the more vocal participants, as well as helpful reassurance that can allow the quieter participants to fully listen and engage without distraction.
If participation is very uneven, suggest a structured go-around to give each person a chance to speak. Here is one option:
First, ask members of the group who want to speak to raise their hands.
Second, create a speaking order by assigning a number to each person.
Third, call on those people in the order assigned.
Finally, after the last person has spoken, ask if any one else has something to say.
Agreed upon time-limits (e.g., 2-3 minutes per sharing) are another possible tool. You can keep track of how long each person speaks and raise your hand when time is up, encouraging them to wrap up their comments.
Someone seems disengaged or shut out?
Open invitations foster open dialogue.
Some participants may need encouragement to fully express their thoughts and feelings. Be aware of those who tend to stay quiet and look for signs that may indicate their wish to speak (body language, facial expressions, etc.).
Give space for everyone to speak their mind without singling anyone out using open invitations such as:
“What do others think?”
“Are there other ways of looking at this?”
“Does this discussion raise any other questions for anyone?”
“Let’s hear from someone who hasn’t spoken for a while.”
Consider saying gentle “encouragers” to quieter individuals such as:
“Interesting, tell us more?”
“Really? Go on.”
Graciously accept any decisions to not participate and move on.
Participants aren’t talking to each other?
Mutual understanding fosters deeper connections.
If participants are answering the discussion questions but struggling to connect with one another, think about some follow up questions that require them to speak to each other rather than respond to you or the question directly. Consider asking some “connective” questions such as:
“Does anyone have a similar example or had a similar experience?”
“Does anyone else have a different view?”
“What else does this discussion bring up for the group?”